Headache..

Well, now that i've locked this blog.. Here is to destress and stuff. I'm having a headache and i have no idea why. =.= not enough water? i think so... Was supposed to get a mask and clean my room but couldnt and didnt even think of doing it.

Parents was talking about having a game plan so that my holiday dont come to waste and as much as I dont like them telling me what to do... they are right.. I need a game plan and i need one pronto.

Game plan

1) get all the notes of sem 3

2) start guitar classes.

3) Make my work out schedule.

4) Revise my sem 2 stuff

5) this is not a joke. I'm serious.. get a system in place and im keeping this list short. I've made long list before and it never works. Short list and i hope to complete it. At least I know i done something then. :P

Crap

There was a few moments when i felt maybe hmm.. i should change the title of this blog. Life's not that bad anymore. :D but today.. i've felt it. The feeling when i first started this blog. The need for me to write things here. I know a blog is supposed to share your feelings and such with people and not this. To write about your crap emo stuff and put it online. But i just feel better after..

Life sucks. People can give you all kind of motivational talks and quotes. I have to say I can give better quotes than most but in the end, :(. nothing. No quotes, no talks no nothing can help you if you're depressed. Only yourself. I thought maybe if you found someone special? Nope. I just found it more depressing. Maybe if you had friends to talk to about life? They can listen but then what? It still ends up the same. I cant do it much longer.

All my life, i've lived on miracles. Not major ones like ressurection but minor ones thats important to my life. Now i think its time to face to music. And it sucks.

I thought I found someone special to talk to. I thought we connected on every level. But no.. In the end, it was a fantasy. It was imaginary. And the truth hurts. Not THE TRUTH. but the truth but maybe there isnt any romantic crap like those on tv. people just need the idea to survive their lives. And although i can accept that. It just sucks.

I've had enough. No more day dreaming. No more fantasies. No more.

Day 10

One confession

I debated on what to confess about? Deepest darkest secret? Person i like?

I think i'm going to say the truth..

I have seriously no idea what to do in life.. I told a lot people about what i want to do, my plans.. how i want to live life, but truthfully when i think about it.. there's no enthusiasm and its all going along with the motion. I sincerely have no idea what i'm going to do and it kinda scares me. :(

Day 9

Two aspirations.

1) Being someone who do not procrastinate

-most people might laugh at this but for me, the most serious problem i have is procrastinating. Always leaving things not done and waiting till the deadline...

2) Becoming someone who would not worry about money and able to do volunteer work

-well its not about being so rich i dont have to work, but by having a job that can cover those periods of time i would be able to spend a month off to go maybe cambodia for a mission trip..